Elsewhere

i'm spectral for days on end these days with thoughts about visiting so how about my voice rings out for you & you could tell me what you're doin? \ well the truth is i lost all track of time & i wound up wandering & unravelling fragments all inside but i rise up aligning cuz the truth is i don't know what but you did it AAAAAAAA but how long will i wander by your side how long will i wander? i wonder if that's what it might feel like i figured i'd warn ya i am out of my god damn mind & out to california follow along the dotted line with with arcs of our blood the truth is i don't know what i'ma find it AAAAAAAA after the drugs have worn off & we're brittle in the light would you still be there for me still do things for me? soul on the radio shakin your car around city to city montclair & elsewhere nervous about goin over its all true i like you you move me but the truth is i don't know what i thought i knew it AAAAAAAA

washing windows with angelina i don't understand anything violent angles from side to side how'd you get so tangled up in my life? how'd you get so caught? how'd you get so tangled up? i love you like it's the old days when i could ask you anything how'd you get so tangled up in my thinking? how'd you get so caught? how'd you get so tangled up?

walkin outside labyrinthian over cracks along under the trees i know this town grounded in a compass cardinal landing in the dogwood i keep goin over it over & over my steps iterate my shame how come every outcome's such a comedown lately afternoon with the shades drawn down i kept sayin i just wanted to see you sayin what's wrong with that? needle shakin outlines in a compass every outcome's such a comedown i knew it when i saw it so i did just what i wanted so i go through with this i knew happiness when i saw it i saw your boyfriend at the port authority that's a sort of fucked up place well so i averted my stride on a quick one he's coming back from goin over your place, huh i feel like we could forget about it i feel like i could mellow out i don't feel undone in a big way there's nothing really bad to be upset about, well just when i thought i was getting better i woke up on the ground an appointment or a disappointment any outcome's such a comedown as if i needed a reminder that i do only what i wanna so i go through with this walkin out in the nighttime springtime needling my way home i saw leah on the bus a few months ago i saw some old friends at her funeral my steps keep splitting my grief through these solipsistic moods i should call my parents when i think of them i should tell my friends when i love them maybe i should've got out a bit more when you guys where still in town but i got too caught up in my own shit that's how every outcome's such a comedown i knew it when i saw it o, i did just what i wanted so i go through with this i knew happiness when i saw it & i saw it

so satisfied i said a lot of things tonight so long aphasia & the ways it kept me hiding it's not so much exactly all the words i used it's more that i was somehow down to let them loose so complicated i cant wait to get explaining your listening distended out since i've been crying so long aphasia & the ways it kept me hidden so long to silent nerves & hesitant oblivion you came & sent me out unfurling in the street & i felt unprecedented confidence in speaking stick around im thinking things'll be alright newly delivered wont you live with me tonight something tonight was such a letdown on my pride it takes a part of me i don't got to take some things in stride i'd pace around the place so quiet in myself id wake the next & see my silence went unfelt just when i thought i had this pattern sorted out apparently my ventricles are full of doubt now nah things go wrong sometimes don't let it freak you out but if i don't have you by me then i'll go underground! nah but what you've got was in your reaches all along plus one day you'll be reaching for me & i'll be gone to help remind myself I wrote this little song one day i won't need your love one day i won't define myself by the one i'm thinkin of & if one day i won't need it one day you won't need it

rolling on his back like an ocelot crawling on his stomach you make the lids stick together nothing really bugs me out nothing really bugs me tightening the slack on the millimeter tape trudging through your stomach i make the walls split forever nothing really bugs me out nothing really bugs me anymore anymore anymore anymore i've had enough now we're on the same page now we’re on the same page! circling the gap like you don't know what you hold drying out my knuckles you tucked it between the fold nothing really bugs me out nothing really bugs me recycling the cans at the center by the boxcars we've been carving little symbols in the bark nothing really bugs me out nothing really bugs me out so let it go: there's nothing I could tell you that you don’t already know!

i was walkin with my neck out some ways i wish i was was walkin with my neck out in some ways that i wish that i was out on the bevel of sound it sounds like everything else you'll know it when you hear it cuz u know the way my voice felt ignore my tone & everything i sing i sing for me ignore the phone on your bed it rings it rings it rings shirt collar ringin me out & my collar bone got all red & already severing prose i wrote so i sing instead i hold you put your neck out tell me the ways you wish you were keep your confidence sound, your hook my eye my spur so when i went to hang out, i hung behind your eyes but my eyes still flicker with doubt quickly o i cant decide i'm tapped out don't it always seem to go that you could hold it right in your hands collapsing & still not know (your hands' collapse & still not know) say what it is say how it is with everybody i know i've got no temper for that i send you this cadmium red, one for every layer i shed & i shed one layer for thisss say what it is it's so impossible but if i just say what it is it tends to sublimate away when i was looking to drop my life away more every year i shine light on edges i tried to unfeel but we've gotta do better than that some sortin out so i'll be sittin on the outskirts if you wanna talk about it things in there were just gettin so loud say what it is it's so impossible but i just say what it is it tends to sublimate away when i was looking to drop my life away

do you wanna dance? fine but do you remember when in your living room when we made some room & moved ourselves around in it? it's how my heart resumed i got caught/ you got those caravaggio moves we had some good ideas but we never left that fucking room do you wanna talk? fine i’ll talk it out with my dad it's always nice what he says he’ll have some good advice from something in a book he read if i did what i wanted then why do i feel so bad? would you like a drink while we wait for everything to get good again? we’re good at things & so are a lot of our friends we should forget these setbacks & get back movin again i dont know what i’m afraid of but i’m afraid one day it all will fall away maybe i read that but still, let’s see if nothing else it’s an idle curiosity so would you like that drink? fine, yea i know. i remember that too in your living room, right? when we began to fight but then we both got confused then we were laughing & crying in awe of the size of the moon do you want to die? fine you’re right but i wonder what it feels like to stop feelin so alive what if we could wake up in five years & things’d be feelin alright? i wanna visit the future & dance in a field of light!

is there anyone here i know? i look around the room, whatever, i let it go steve's in germany thats it i try to think of anyone else no, yea that's it so i resolve to make new friends i liked my old ones but i fucked up so i'll start again what's the worst that could happen strings fray like my good days tied around my finger i felt so afraid i had my mind on her or on my own and when i looked back up everybody else was gone so i resolve to make new friends someone tell me to quit my head and help me forget it what's the worst that could happen the end of summer and i'm still in love with her i said forget it was it worse that i wasn't sure the end of summer and i'm still in love with her i said forget it forget it forget it